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I what you mean then. But yeah, I am..I guess clinging to him. I mean outside of the kink we do stuff, we are friends first,and I enjoy his company. But I know he likes tying me up, I don't know if he really views it as Doming though.. I guess we really should have a much more in depth talk. Though we'd had quite a talk about what I had been anticipating as "Pet for a day" and that,obviously, failed. I am starting to wonder if his ideas of this lifestyle and mine are really much more different then I thought, or if perhaps he's not as serious about it as I am as for not having to there isn't really any way I could flat out refuse. My own personality just won't let me receive and not give back. Even if I don't have fun/enjoy while I am doing it for him I just can't bring myself to refuse. I would feel then like all I was doing was taking advantage of him. I already feel guilty I don't offer to do it for him, and he has to ask me to do it.(It's not orders. It's more of taking turns. He does me, then he expects me to do him, tying up, gags, getting him off.)If he just wanted me to get him off I wouldn't mind it as much, it's the tying him up and stuff that makes me miserable because I view it as Doming and I really hate it. I would be happier if he just wanted me to suck him, or a hand job or anything like that. That thought process is part of why I asked if I was selfish because no matter how I look at it I feel selfish when I think of asking him to not have me tie him up anymore and just get him off with hand or mouth or whatever Thank you everyone who has responded. I appreciate all your feed back and advice and suggestions.

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