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divorce him .then that is fine you are looking for validation of a decision you already reached! Also your title was confused .not ready to bail!!! BTW, I am very sure people around you told you not to get married so or have so and you ignored them you know why you thought you knew better and could do it all! I bet you do not have a job I am assuming .how can you take care of 4 with absent dad .maybe you need to go back to school and improve your chances .maybe he is depressed (that deployment I would not be too surprised) maybe yes you should leave and deal with the fall out. who knows? what I know is you are making decision when you are exhausted! you said you are not depressed!!! well your posts do not sound like a happy person making a sound decision today or the past 10yrs. maybe enroll in post secondary and get a life beside being a mom and a wife .just being you! You can tell him what you wrote here. and you can give yourself a deadline for an exit. He is not even around enough to get know you or you get to know him! It is very possible you two are drifted beyond repair .but you know something focus on bettering yourself .there is no point of trying to get divorce when your future looks so bleak. get education (I am not sure if military wives get grants or such) but educate yourself so prepare to be independent after all he could also die tomorrow so this should be your focus really.
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